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 I'm a Bad, Bad Uncle

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The House of Ainsley
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Male Number of posts : 1996
Age : 45
Location : The Dark Heart of Bardosylvania

PostSubject: I'm a Bad, Bad Uncle   Tue Feb 24, 2015 2:38 pm

I can't just give gifts like a normal person, oh no; all too often, I just can't resist the urge to mix in some kind of prank or practical joke along with the gift.  The most recent incident was last Christmas, when I sent gifts to my two nephews, Drew and Alex.  Drew got off scot free; he opened his package and there were a pair of foam scimitars for him to whammy on Alex with.  But Alex got to experience the emotional trauma of tearing off the wrapping paper and finding the box to some kind of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic toy...something to do with Pinkie Pie, I forget what it was.  My brother called me to tell me how Alex's disappointed little face just about hit the floor when he saw that box with cute little Pinkie Pie on it, right after Drew had just opened up something which most little boys would consider cool.  But Alex persisted and opened up the box to find his real present: A Nerf zombie shooter pistol.  And lo, in that instant, Alex's mood instantly sprang from dejected to giddy with elation, and Drew and Alex spent the rest of Christmas Day chopping each other and shooting at each other.  And all was well with the world.

Well, I decided that I could do even better than that.  You see, Drew and Alex both have their birthdays this month, so it's time for me to send them another couple of presents.  Yes, I'm late getting the gifts sent off, sue me.  So anyway, I got on the Desura indie games site, I bought two games for my nephews to enjoy, I burned each of the Windows .EXE files to its own blank DVD, I broke out my CD Stomper, my copy of Paint Shop Pro and my copy of Avery DesignPro, and I got to work.

Here's what I finally churned out:






Hey, those look like a couple of nice games to help a 6-year-old and a 10-year-old burn through the weekends, right?  Cartoon characters?  Check.  Cleverly written descriptions about the game?  Check.  It's a video game?  Check.  Did I mention the colorful cartoon characters?  Check.  So it has all the mirth and benign character of a popular children's game.

By the way, for the benefit of those not in the know, here are some videos to show what the Five Nights at Freddy's games are actually like:

         

Oh, yeah...they're horror games, all right!  Suspense, eerie atmosphere, plenty of weird noises, things moving around when they shouldn't be moving, jumpscares galore...heh heh heh!  And I lied through my teeth with those game descriptions, and I printed up some deceptively cute DVD labels and jewel box labels...oh, Drew and Alex are going to walk in blind, expecting one thing but getting another as soon as they fire 'em up.  I'm going to hear all about this stunt before the month's out!  Maybe Drew and Alex will wet their beds, and my brother's going to call me up and chew me out about that.  Who knows?  No Chuck E. Cheese's in the world could ever be as horrid as Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, for real.

I'm mailing the CDs off this morning.  I can hardly wait!  Very Happy

Here's the demo, if you want to try Five Nights at Freddy's for yourself.  I have the full version for both games, and I might have to pick up FNAF3 when it comes out in a month or two.  I still haven't beaten the games, and I still can't stop myself from jumping every time one of those damned killer robots in fursuits jumps up and grabs me.  But saints know I'm trying.

I'll report on current progress as my nephews receive their packages and install the games, followed by the boys tossing and turning at night while my brother yells at me for making his life harder.  Stay tuned.  >:]
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Wraith
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PostSubject: Re: I'm a Bad, Bad Uncle   Thu Mar 05, 2015 3:10 am

OMG....

You are Terrible....

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GoldenDrakon
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PostSubject: Re: I'm a Bad, Bad Uncle   Sun Mar 08, 2015 8:01 am

Yet manically, villainously brilliant.

*Karnoz approves*

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"Who am I? I'm your StoryTeller."
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The House of Ainsley
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Male Number of posts : 1996
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Location : The Dark Heart of Bardosylvania

PostSubject: Re: I'm a Bad, Bad Uncle   Sun Mar 08, 2015 8:53 pm

I am what I am, and you flatter me. Very Happy

Alas, my brother's computer so happens to be conked out from too much malware and AVG Free (which is one of the lousiest antivirus programs you could ask for). So it looks like the prank's payoff is going to have to wait until my brother gets his computer fixed by a pro. Here's hoping that he doesn't slack on that, because I'm really chomping at the bit here.

By the way, Five Nights at Freddy's 3 finally launched.



Glorious. Twisted Evil
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