The Vale A-B-C

What about ordinary jousting? The kind with horses and lances?

X-Treme Jousting!!!

You know all this talk about jousting make me think of a movie.

"Come back her nave so that I may brain thee." Jim Carry. Cable Guy

Zounds! That reminds me: Aren't you that guy who once played some Fighter who jousted and unhorsed another Fighter who had ten Levels over him back in some D&D campaign or another?

That was epic.

Awesome as that event was, that fighter could not have accomplished such a feat without the help of some lousy rolls by a DM that shall remain unnnamed.

Bah! You're just being modest.

*chuckles*

Dear me.... I really, really hate that I've never actually played a classic DnD game. It sucks to think of what I've missed out on.

...except that you're doing just that in the House of Ainsley forum over yonder.

But if you're talking about traditional tabletop play with a rather large table, a gaggle of goofy friends, a pouch full of funny-shaped dice and a case of Mountain Dew...then yes, it sounds as if you've missed out. Dorm cops paying you a visit because the people down the hall can't tell a roleplayed scream from a real scream are optional.

For the love of a Deity! *catches funny bone on the door handle time and time again....*

Its really not funny anymore...

Gods have names, you know. "Holy Zeus!" remains one of my favorite exclamations.

Here we come reach for your gun
And you better listen well my friend, you see
It's been slow down below,
Aimed at you we're the cowboys from hell
Deed is done again, we've won
Ain't talking no tall tales friend
'Cause high noon, your doom
Comin' for you we're the cowboys from hell

*Shameless plug for my Metal tune of the week*

I'm not sure how to respond to all this...

Just keep walking and don't make eye contact. That's how.

Keep walking away this way I can stalk you while you back is tunred.

Lacking expertise in your field, I must ask how exactly one would "tunr" his back.

My plan is working. You are so confused by my spelling that you will not notice me sneaking up on you.

No, you were so distracted with distracting me with your spelling that you didn't see my homegirl Wraith sneaking up on you.

Take him down, Wraith!

On that note I will interrupt our regularly scheduled conversation with a funny story between a teacher and her student.

TEACHER:  Tommy if you have 10 cakes and someone asks you for two how many do you have left?
TOMMY:  I still have ten cakes because, I'm not giving any of my cakes to anyone.
TEACHER:  But what if someone takes two of your cakes without asking,  how many cakes do you have left now?
TOMMY:  10 cakes plus 1 dead body.    

We now can return to our regularly scheduled conversation.

Presumably, our conserv conversation got knocked off its regular schedule for a while there.  

Quite right you are. What should we strike up a conversation about this week?

Reptiles. Definitely reptiles.

How 'bout those bearded dragons, huh? Wraith is so lucky to have these critters scampering through her back yard.

Snakes have always been my favorite reptiles.  I have always wanted to make a shirt with about a 10 rubber snakes attached to it, then come running out of the reptile house at the zoo when there is a class of small children waiting to enter.  I would be screaming, "GET EM OFF GET EM OFF!!!" 

A cruel thought to be sure, but if would be worth it to watch their horrified expressions.

Take pictures if you ever do go through with that. Posterity demands it!